I can say with some certainty that I understand how a broken winged bird must feel. Once you’ve tasted flight, felt the wind in your wings, looked down on Earth from a clouds view, how could you live a life grounded for the rest of your days?
There is an anxiousness in the air and my nerves are on edge. I’ve been waiting for this day for weeks now. This is the day I see my oncologist to find out if the pathology results show that I need chemotherapy or not.
I had my follow up appointment with the Radiation Therapy physician to find out if he thought I would need to go through the radiation therapy treatments after reviewing my pathology report from surgery.
A sadness falls over me today in waves that I can’t explain. I’m surrounded by the beauty of the beach and yet my heart aches like it feels death. A longing perhaps, for another time, another place.
I woke with a migraine. I’ve been getting them ever since I had surgery and they’ve been really intense. I believe it might be because of the medications I’ve been on and my body getting them out of my system.
Sharing my story hasn’t come easy for me, journaling about it is easy but sharing it, not so much. It’s personal, it’s painful and it’s been life changing.
Please note these are my opinions and I’m not a physician. My opinion comes from my experience and circumstances only.
Many people have asked me about the discovery of my breast cancer. Did I feel it? Was it on an annual mammogram or a doctor’s visit?
For me, my breasts have always been lumpy and one more lump didn’t really feel any different than another. I’ve done self breast exams but probably not with the intent of really knowing what I should feel. I’ve had multiple cysts over the years and if my OB/GYN doctor didn’t feel anything unusual during my annual visits, then why would I feel something different?